Rising Action....THingy

So I'm gonna post mine, which was simply one sentence.

The dog lunged at his face.

But to make it more interesting, lets make it....this dog... >:3

Much better.

Now I will post Jade's...thingy.

Erhmm note, this is explicit, so for all of you who cannot stop giggling at the word 'slut' or perhaps names like 'Bitchy McGee' please don't bother reading. You'll wet your pants. Or do read it, I'll laugh at you and make you cry.

Now without further ado...

Sir Mr. McSlut walk his puppy Onika Minaj (I like this name) to the park to take a pee behind a bush. Onika, of course, was in the park that cloudy gray evening only to empty herself of bladder urges. Mr. McSlut however, was there to get some BOOTY. He wore his most boss triangular hat, his buttoned up silk top, and pants so tight that he was no longer fertile of that morning.

'Lucky for the ladies...'he though, and his mind trailed off to murkier waters. (perv)

"Onika! Piss already ya dumb hoe!" McSlut exclaimed to his dog.

"Listen McSlut," Onika barked, "Calm it down. I will freakin' bite you in the cajones, that is, if your tightass pants havn't already!"

"Hush now Onika, don't be hatin'!" (this is a rly gangster white boy)
Then McSlut spotted....gorgeousness.(not sure this is a word but I like it...) A chick in an oddly shaped dress with wide hips looked at him whilst she sat on a bench.

"Damn girl, you flabby." he said. (Is that even a pickup line? o.o)
"I know right? You rich, sucka, pay for my lipo!" (So thats what kids these days get into relationships for, it all makes sense now :D)
"Psht, shut up Bitchy McGee."(Um...is this some mating ritual I've not seen?)
"How'd you know my name???" (Oh lord more drugged parents, I feel your pain gurl)
"OMG girl...you and me 4-eva." (Don't do it! Its a trap!!!!)

Onike sniffed at her owner's crotch.
'Oh my,' she thought.'He's a woman.' (HA I TOLD YOU!~ ;D)

PS. The parenthesis was not written by Ms. Wilson but rather my own personal thoughts.